Dwayne Johnson has carved out an acting career for himself that others dream of; it's surreal how quickly he's taken over Hollywood, both on the big screen (The Fast and Furious films, the recent Jumanji sequels) and the small screen (HBO's Ballers) and beyond. Just recently, it was announced that Johnson plans to produce a reboot of The Scorpion King, the action-fantasy film that served as his first leading role.
This isn't Johnson's first reboot of course (as shown by the previously mentioned Jumanji films) and it won't be the last. So what other films should Johnson reboot for future starring vehicles? We've got several ideas in mind.
10 John Carpenter's Vampires (1998)
Vampires starred James Woods as the leader of a group of vampire hunters who must prevent the first and strongest vampire from getting his hands on an ancient cross that will make him invincible. It's considered to be one of director John Carpenter's less successful films, though there's room for improvement in the right hands.
Johnson hasn't done a film in the horror genre since The Mummy Returns, so let's see him make a horror-tinged Western that sees him go wrestle with creatures of the night, and handing the keys to a director like Sam Raimi or Leigh Whannell could make for one hell of a blood-soaked ride. Besides, Carpenter might be happier with Johnson remaking this film rather than making a follow-up to Big Trouble in Little China.
9 Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever (2002)
This 2002 action thriller is famous for scoring a 0% approval rating, and after watching it it’s not hard to see why. It’s an absolute mess from beginning to end with no coherence whatsoever, plot twists that don’t add up, and poorly staged action scenes. It's especially disappointing because the film has a pretty fun idea: two rival agents from different agencies engage in a cat-and-mouse game of gunfights and fistfights before teaming up against a common threat.
Johnson of course is a natural at playing tough law enforcement types, and could easily slide into the male lead role. His Hobbs and Shaw director David Leitch should helm this one, and he could give a remake the kind of action scenes that make the original look inferior. As for the female lead, that could easily go to Johnson’s frequent co-star Gal Gadot. And a title change would probably be a wise decision.
8 Alien Nation (1988)
The original Alien Nation focused on an alien species known as the Tenctonese (also called the "Newcomers") who are assimilated into Los Angeles despite hostility from the locals. A human detective (James Caan) is partnered with a Newcomer (Mandy Patinkin) and they slowly begin to learn from the other along the way. A remake had been announced back in 2016, though little movement has happened since. The concept is definitely strong enough to work again, with its mashup of the buddy cop and sci-fi genres, as well as social commentary regarding systematic racism. Johnson would be a great fit for the Caan role, and there are a number of talented actors who would fit in the Newcomer part.
7 Red Sonja (1985)
A Red Sonja reboot has been in development hell since the mid-2000s; last we heard Transparent creator Joey Soloway had signed on to helm this new take, but nothing’s developed since then. But whether Soloway’s version goes forward or not, Johnson could use his considerable influence as a producer to finally get this film made, and could even play a role in it if things work out.
The original film had Arnold Schwarzenegger play the role of Kalidar, a warrior who aided Sonja on her quest for vengeance. Not to say that the reboot should follow the same plot as the original, but it would be cool to have Johnson play a supporting role similar to Kalidar in a reboot alongside Sonja (played by Karen Gillan, perhaps?), or maybe even as a villain of sorts.
6 Maximum Overdrive (1986)
Johnson’s no stranger to movies involving cars (as the Fast and Furious films will show), but what if those cars turned against him? Maximum Overdrive was the only directing effort from author Stephen King, where Earth passes through the tail of a comet that brings all machines to sentient, murderous life. Hated on its release, it's now become a cult classic thanks to its "so-bad-it's-good" quality, but it could be interesting to see how a remake could up the tension, thrills, and dark humor considerably. King's own son Joe Hill recently pitched a remake that would see self-driving cars go haywire after an electrical virus messes with their systems and landing an actor like Johnson to lead the film and someone like James Gunn in the director's chair would make this remake a huge improvement over the original.
5 The Cannonball Run (1981)
The Cannonball Run series saw the likes of Burt Reynolds, Jackie Chan, and Dean Martin come together for a cross-country race. Johnson could make his own stamp on the franchise not only by taking on a lead role but by getting some of his own celebrity buddies - Kevin Hart, Ryan Reynolds, and Alexandra Daddario - to join him here. It would even be funnier if, as per our own suggestion, that these actors played exaggerated versions of themselves in this remake. Throw in a director that can handle slapstick-style action and comedic timing and this one is a surefire hit.
4 Cyborg (1989)
This Jean-Claude Van Damme film is a fun romp but could use a modern tune-up. The original followed a young cyborg who travels to New York City in order to retrieve information on a cure for an ongoing plague (sound familiar?). She is aided in her quest by a mercenary (Van Damme) as they are targeted by ruthless marauders. Johnson has more than enough charisma and presence to take on the mercenary role alongside an unknown in the cyborg role, and the right creative team could create a harrowing dystopian atmosphere that builds on the original's and comments on the damaging effects of a widespread virus.
3 Kazaam (1996)
It might sound ridiculous to suggest a remake of this infamous flop, which saw Shaquille O'Neal play a rapping genie who helps a young boy. But since it isn't remembered fondly, it wouldn't be the worst thing to keep the basic outline of the story intact while changing everything else, tailoring it more to The Rock's strengths. The original was rated PG, but a PG-13 version could be a lot of fun if it goes for the clever visual humor and pathos that the original failed at. Johnson's Jumanji director Jake Kasdan would be a good fit for this remake.
2 Dead Heat (1988)
As great as it was, we can't help but wonder how modern effects and a larger budget could improve on 1988's cult buddy cop horror-comedy Dead Heat. Starring Treat Williams and Joe Piscopo, that film saw two detectives encounter zombies while investigating a case, which results in one of the cops being killed and reanimated as a zombie. As with John Carpenter's Vampires, it would be great to see Johnson in another horror film, especially with the added twist of him now being a zombie cop. That idea alone would definitely get butts in seats.
1 Last Action Hero (1993)
A laughingstock back then, Last Action Hero has rightfully earned itself a devoted cult following thanks to its quirky meta-humor along with a hilarious self-referential performance by Arnold Schwarzenegger. But with action movies being much different nowadays, it would be fun to see what a new version of this film could offer. And since Schwarzenegger was the biggest action star back then, who better to take on the lead role than the biggest action star now? In fact, the film's title might be more relevant than it was then.
While we undoubtedly love superhero films, there are those out there who miss the days of big, bombastic action blockbusters. A Last Action Hero remake could call attention to this, whilst also sending up the cliches of modern action films - particularly those starring Johnson himself - and Johnson's celebrity persona in general. The directing team of Phil Lord and Chris Miller would be perfect for this one.
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November 29, 2020 at 06:30AM
