On Netflix's hit reality sensation, The Circle, viewers watched contestants dance the night away, compete in Nailed It-style baking challenges, and cook brussels sprouts for the first time from the confines of isolation. But how much fun would it have been to watch this colorful cast of characters and catfishes sit down to play a rousing game of Dungeons & Dragons?
Netflix was likely better off appealing to a more mainstream demographic with their challenges, but it's a novel thought experiment nevertheless. Since history cannot be rewritten, here are the D&D classes of ten contestants from the first season of the U.S. installment of The Circle.
10 The Paladin: Shubham
Unlike many of the contestants who were role-playing a character to gain popularity, Shubham joined The Circle as himself and was often critical of people and behaviors he perceived to be fake. It is a character trait that is typical of the paladin class, and it left him with a rather large blind spot some players used to their advantage.
Shubham's honesty and wholesomeness helped him rise rapidly in the rankings of contestants and fans alike, but viewers were fearful of his growing closeness with Rebecca/Seaburn. Fortunately, all’s well that ends well, and their friendship seems to have survived the big reveal.
9 The Bard: Seaburn/Rebecca
The next most obvious class assignment is Seaburn as the party bard. The only catfish to make it to the final five, Seaburn charmed his way elimination after elimination, often by the skin of his teeth, through the strength of his personality and carefully chosen alliances.
As the shy and good-natured Rebecca, Seaburn won over several powerful allies including Joey and Sammie, who would later prove their loyalty even while suspecting Rebecca of being a catfish. Seaburn wasn't always the best fibber, but his lies were always entertaining.
8 The Barbarian: Joey
Life’s a party if you are Joey Sasso, the lovable gym rat and mama’s boy who won season 1 of The Circle, and isn't that the barbarian class's motto? (When not otherwise consumed by bloodlust, of course.)
It’s clear that all of Joey’s attribute points were applied to his muscles. As unrefined as this Jersey boy could be, in a bar fight, he’s definitely the ally someone would want by their side. Of course, Joey would have probably started the fight, to begin with.
7 The Cleric: Chris
Since day one, Chris was open about his religion and was vocal about his message of positivity and acceptance while appearing on The Circle. Like Shubham, Chris didn’t join as a character, but he also didn’t seem to mind if other contestants did. Even suspected catfishes were welcomed at Chris's table provided they repaid his hospitality with some juicy gossip. For viewers, it was an entertaining form of communion to watch.
Chris emerged as the mediator of the group, and was hands down, the best dressed of all the contestants. Viewers could always count on Chris to dress up for an occasion.
6 The Druid: Alana
Alana was the first contestant to be blocked, which is probably for the best. From the get-go, her crunchy lifestyle and aloof attitude didn't mesh well with the rest of the group. Many contestants suspected the Texan model of being a catfish almost immediately, but in reality, she was just too much of an influencer to be relatable.
Alana is back with her own kind now, Disney princesses and other woodland creatures, abusing the taco emoji on all her social media posts.
5 The Fighter: Antonio
Unlike Joey, Antonio has the discipline of a professional athlete to be the party's fighter. Confident and level-headed, he's the tank you want leading the party. Antonio has the hit-points to take the first punch and the restraint not to accidentally set off all the traps by charging blindingly into a dungeon without a plan — unlike Joey.
However, creativity is a skill Antonio lacks and that hurt him in the competition. His game never really evolved much beyond flirting with the female contestants, which only got him so far.
4 The Rogue: Sammie
Sammie was one of the finalists on season 1 of The Circle, but her path to the final five was not an easy one. Her place in the rankings varied wildly from week to week.
Sammie was one of the contestants that came into the competition committed to doing whatever it took to win. In the early episodes, she gave the impression of being a bit of a loner, but over time Sammie began to let down her guard and allow for friendships to form. Loyalty proved to be a better strategy in the end since it helped get her to the finale. Fortunately, Sammie was a nimble and quick thinker and was able to pivot mid-game, unlike others.
3 The Warlock: Tammy & Ed
In Dungeons & Dragons, a warlock receives his or her power and instructions from an entity from another plane. On The Circle, Ed received those instructions from his mother, who he brought with him onto The Circle.
Ed lost more than he gained from this devil's bargain. Tammy's advice was often out of touch with the younger contestants, and other players suspected Ed of being either a catfish or a creep based on the inconsistencies in his public persona.
2 The Wizard: Adam/Alex
Adam has almost certainly played Dungeons & Dragons in real life, and his character, Alex, was the quintessential Ranger played by many men: Handsome, chill, good at everything, and beloved by women. He was Aragon with a surfers tan.
But Adam himself is more of a mage. He played a numbers game during his time on The Circle, which is the sort of detailed, premeditated attack plan only a wizard could come up with. Unfortunately for Adam, trying to cast a spell on your competitors with a bunch of pre-packaged pick-up lines is a recipe for disaster, and he was soon blocked from the party.
1 The Ranger: Bill
It's no wonder Adam/Alex felt threatened almost immediately by Bill's entrance. Bill was everything Adam was attempting to be in-game as Alex.
But as Highlander has taught us, "there can be only one." Adam/Alex and Bill canceled each other out and neither could build the alliances they needed to advance to the finals while the other was around. Aspiring contestants for season 2 of The Circle should take note of this cautionary tale. It is much better to be a loveable team player like Joey Sasso than Bill, the Lone Wolf.
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April 24, 2020 at 05:30AM